ONBC Monday Night Thread - Holiday Traditions and Plans

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Gilbert's Girl
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Unread postby Gilbert's Girl » Sat Dec 17, 2005 4:24 am

Jackslady wrote:
Endora wrote:It's been nice to read all your stories here. We have a few family traditions, the when we open presents and what we eat stuff, all pretty dull but a consoling pattern in their own way.

My DH and kids still love Christmas, but a few years ago my parents died , one each side of Christmas, pretty unexpectedly. Being an only child made it seem even harder. I've never really been comfortable with it since then, so I actually just grit my teeth and long for New Year.


My thoughts are with you, endora. I'm an only child too and since my parents died I have no relatives at all. Since I have no partner or kids either, I'm now on my fourth Christmas alone - I've actually spent three Christmas Days alone, it's not that bad really, I still make myself a complete Christmas dinner, I eat by candlelight in the kitchen, listen to my favourite choral music, then go for a walk and watch wall to wall Johnny until bed time! This year a friend has kindly asked me to her house, I honestly don't know whether I'll enjoy it or not. Of all the days in the year, it's the one when I miss my family and particularly my parents the most. I think all families have their own particular Christmas traditions and visiting others you can feel like you're intruding.

I've really enjoyed reading this thread and finding out what everyone does for Christmas, I hope everyone here has a wonderful time!!

I wonder if there are any other zoners out there like me who have no family, or like endora, may find Christmas difficult because some family members are no longer here?


Hopefully you can pop in here for some company as I for one will be zoning later in the day.But sounds like you have a good time on your own chilling out and not getting stressed even though you miss your family :grouphug:

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Unread postby Jackslady » Sat Dec 17, 2005 5:21 am

Gilbert's Girl wrote:
Jackslady wrote:
Endora wrote:It's been nice to read all your stories here. We have a few family traditions, the when we open presents and what we eat stuff, all pretty dull but a consoling pattern in their own way.

My DH and kids still love Christmas, but a few years ago my parents died , one each side of Christmas, pretty unexpectedly. Being an only child made it seem even harder. I've never really been comfortable with it since then, so I actually just grit my teeth and long for New Year.


My thoughts are with you, endora. I'm an only child too and since my parents died I have no relatives at all. Since I have no partner or kids either, I'm now on my fourth Christmas alone - I've actually spent three Christmas Days alone, it's not that bad really, I still make myself a complete Christmas dinner, I eat by candlelight in the kitchen, listen to my favourite choral music, then go for a walk and watch wall to wall Johnny until bed time! This year a friend has kindly asked me to her house, I honestly don't know whether I'll enjoy it or not. Of all the days in the year, it's the one when I miss my family and particularly my parents the most. I think all families have their own particular Christmas traditions and visiting others you can feel like you're intruding.

I've really enjoyed reading this thread and finding out what everyone does for Christmas, I hope everyone here has a wonderful time!!

I wonder if there are any other zoners out there like me who have no family, or like endora, may find Christmas difficult because some family members are no longer here?


Hopefully you can pop in here for some company as I for one will be zoning later in the day.But sounds like you have a good time on your own chilling out and not getting stressed even though you miss your family :grouphug:


thanks for those kind words GG - yes, I think I will definitely be on the zone at some point during the day!!!

I do try to make the best of things, I'm very fortunate compared to a lot of people and and I get a long lie in and to watch what I want on t.v. (IE JD!). It's interesting because I don't know anyone who like myself, has no family at all (I don't just mean on the zone, I mean anywhere), it's a strange experience, I'm always hoping to meet others in the same situation, either on the web on in real life!
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Unread postby Gilbert's Girl » Sat Dec 17, 2005 5:29 am

I would guess that its because most people are not only children and even if they are they have families of their own. The chances of finding someone in a similar position would be quite unusual I suppose.Although I am sure there are people who choose to be alone also.People who don't get on with their families etc.

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Unread postby Charly » Sat Dec 17, 2005 6:11 am

As much as I love Christmas and Christmas Time , for those being alone it`s a sad time .

I remember the first Christmas after my divorce - alone with my kids - that`s been a strange feeling .
But meanwhile the kids and I enjoy celebrating Christmas Eve all alone - we don`t want to go anywhere or get visitors ( even family ) this day !

In our region there are some places ( organized by church ) where those people who are alone can meet and spend Christmas Eve together . I think that`s a wonderful thing and the persons organizing this are real angels :angel:

My thoughts are with you Endora and Jackslady ~ I hope you`ll have a good time anyway .Image


@ Jackslady .... I guess there are a many people which are alone at Christmas , did you ever try to find it out in your region ?
I assume you`d be surprised .
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Unread postby Mrs Pink » Sat Dec 17, 2005 6:29 am

I am flying back to the UK (in about 6 hours time) for Christmas as I always do. Me, my brother and my sisters always try to go back to spend Christmas with our parents. We all live away from our home city, luckily my sisters get to see them more often because they still live in the UK. But my parents are getting to old now to make long journeys so I always insist with my bosses that I get Christmas off work as it's the only time of the year we can all get together. So I guess it's become a tradition that no matter where we are in the world we go home for Christmas.

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Unread postby ibbi 3 » Sat Dec 17, 2005 8:31 am

Queen ~ it's wonderfull your place is open to all those people who come and enjoy themselfs in your company , I wish you a great Christmas.

Endora and Jackslady , I can relate to some parts of your feelings too.
As I wrote in my post , about I use to spend the holidays at my fathers place with a large family ; I have no contact with my family any more since my father died 3 years ago. Exept for one nephew. The family of my husband lives far away. If I didn't have my husband and my children I would be alone too. My husband must work several hours but then will be home again. I like it with just the four of us , but I also miss the large party's at my dad's place. So I have mixed feelings to. I will also spend time online as my children will get together with friends also.

It will be quiet here but some of us will be online at some point .
I wish you all a good time anyway , and Charly , you made some good points in your post , those organisations are everywhere , either by church or the salvation army .
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Unread postby Gilbert's Girl » Sat Dec 17, 2005 8:58 am

Charly wrote:As much as I love Christmas and Christmas Time , for those being alone it`s a sad time .

I remember the first Christmas after my divorce - alone with my kids - that`s been a strange feeling .
But meanwhile the kids and I enjoy celebrating Christmas Eve all alone - we don`t want to go anywhere or get visitors ( even family ) this day !

In our region there are some places ( organized by church ) where those people who are alone can meet and spend Christmas Eve together . I think that`s a wonderful thing and the persons organizing this are real angels :angel:

My thoughts are with you Endora and Jackslady ~ I hope you`ll have a good time anyway .Image


@ Jackslady .... I guess there are a many people which are alone at Christmas , did you ever try to find it out in your region ?
I assume you`d be surprised .


There are certainly charities and organisations who look after elderly or homeless at Christmas in the UK not sure about younger people though.

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Unread postby In-too-Depp » Sat Dec 17, 2005 9:08 am

I actually enjoy spending Christmas alone, although this year I will be spending some time with my fella. I shall go there Friday night and return Christmas morning which suits me fine. This year it will be the first time without my father who died in February so that will be hard. I am one of six children but my family live in my hometown which is about 12 miles away. They don't really keep in contact apart from my one sister so I will get to talk to her on Christmas Day.

I shall spend the day just like I do any other, probably on here with whoever is around. I'll watch some Johnny and might even do more picture sorting. I'm lucky in that I can choose what I want to do which suits me fine.
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Of pleasing others, at his own expense

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Unread postby Jackslady » Sat Dec 17, 2005 12:24 pm

Thanks for your kind comments, everyone!

I guess there are a lot of people, who, though they have family, don't have much contact with them, that's probably a stranger feeling than my situation.
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Unread postby Endora » Sat Dec 17, 2005 12:48 pm

Jackslady wrote:Thanks for your kind comments, everyone!

I guess there are a lot of people, who, though they have family, don't have much contact with them, that's probably a stranger feeling than my situation.


Some people who like crowds of relatives and friends around them at Christmas find it very hard to believe that it can be very nice to spend time alone. They think that you are making it up, putting on a brave face or some other brave reponse. Let's recognise that as well as different traditions, there are different ways of making a day special, and being solitary can be one of those.

Thank you for the kind wishes, ladies.
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Unread postby Liz » Sat Dec 17, 2005 2:43 pm

My heart goes out to those of you who are missing your families at this time of year. :-/ I, too, am an only child and have thought many times about what that will be like when my dad is gone. I’m lucky enough, though, to have my DH and my kiddies.

I think if someone invites you to spend Christmas with them they will not find your presence as an intrusion. Great new traditions can form that way.

I’ll agree with Endora, though, that solitude can be nice sometimes. :chill:
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Unread postby DeppInTheHeartOfTexas » Sat Dec 17, 2005 7:27 pm

I suppose like most things it is what you are used to, eh? I too am an only child but my husband comes from a family with four children. When I was younger my Christmas was usually pretty quiet since the rest of my extended family lived too far away to visit. When I married and became part of my husbands family, man was it weird to have all those people around! :lol: We have spent a few Christmas Days with just our immediate family, some with friends and some with the entire extended family. Each has been special in its own way and each a different memory. This year will be a small one but a good one!
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Unread postby bluebird » Sat Dec 17, 2005 9:45 pm

The Christmas holidays really can be both a blessing and a difficult time for many. It's a time when the memories of my late husband are the most prevalent and when I miss my mother and father the most, too. However, I'm quite blessed with spending time with my kids and my grandkids.
In fact, I spent today with my seven grandkids (ages 3-7) with our annual cookie baking day...it's a day their parents can get last minute shopping or projects done and my grandkids get to pile as many sprinkles on their cutout cookies as they want!!! We watched The Polar Express and then, of course, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. :wonka:

Christmas Day will be a bit different for me this year. We'll be spending it at my daughter's home instead of here at my place. Less work for me!!! Now, if I could only get the tradition of wrapping the presents under control. My "tradition" is to wait until the last minute." :-?

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Unread postby Glendaleigh » Sat Dec 17, 2005 10:14 pm

Bluebird, your cookie-making with grandkids sounds like so much fun. Cookie making when I was little meant we got to frost and decorate the cookies that Mom baked. Those were the best sugar cookies ever. The cookies that my kids and I make have varied over the years, but the togetherness is what I cherish.

Mom always read us the legend of the cherry tree. I can't find that story anywhere, so I have read The Littlest Angel to my kids. They take bets on how many kleenex I'll need before I'm finished reading, but that's traditional, too. This year, each of my sons will get his own copy of The Littlest Angel. I'm hoping for lots more grandkiddies, can you tell?

It's been so nice sharing all of the stories that have been posted so far. It makes me feel so close to each of you. :cloud9:

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Unread postby Liz » Sat Dec 17, 2005 11:36 pm

I know what you mean, Glendaleigh. :grouphug:
You can't judge a book by its cover.

The only thing that matters is the ending. It's the most important part of the story.


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