FI Question #19: My precioussssssss....

by Tom Robbins

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Gypsylee
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Unread postby Gypsylee » Fri Jan 21, 2005 9:13 pm

DITHOT wrote:
"Every once in a while I stop and think if I had five minutes to get anything out of my house or lose it what would I take."

I would grab my computer!!! :rotflmao:
"In the time of your life, live....so that in that wondrous time you shall not add to the misery and sorrow of the world, but shall smile to the infinite delight and mystery of it." Saroyan

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Unread postby nebraska » Fri Jan 21, 2005 11:06 pm

http://www.flylady.net


I am a follower of FLYlady. I get the emails and the testimonials about how to organize my home and my life. FLYlady's biggest soapbox is about getting rid of clutter. periodically she sends out a really inspiring email about how clutter is literally killing us. Her rule is if you don't use it or love it, get rid of it. Let's face it, most of us are surrounded with a lot of stuff that we neither use nor love. And organizing, cleaning, etc. ... taking care of that "stuff" consumes a lot of our time and energy.

When I first started FLYlady, I had a Florence Nightingale lamp in my livingroom. I hated it. I had got it at an office Christmas party, in a game it wasn't even a gift someone had selected for me. But it sat in my living room because it was a Christmas gift. It took me almost a month to get rid of that ugly thing. First I moved it from the china closet to a corner on the floor. then I moved it to a box to be given away. It was a slow painful process. I was unbelievably afraid to let go of anything in the beginning. As I have eliminated more stuff, it has become cleansing. I still have too much, getting rid of it will take me the rest of my life, I think.
'
I really like the posts the last couple of days that explain FI as a sort of spirtitual journey. Very good discussions.

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Re: FI Question #19: My precioussssssss....

Unread postby truelymadlydepply » Fri Jan 21, 2005 11:16 pm

Liz wrote:
Larkwoodgirl wrote:To me this quote implies something a little bit different. I personally do not resent my "permanent space" and the stuff that is in it. In no way do I find it controlling or restricting. My home is my sanctuary from the the world. I view it as a refuge and not as a trap. If I did not have a permanent space in which to seek refuge and peace, I think I would probably go mad. To me the world can be an overwhelming place from which retreat is often needed.

I understand the sentiment of the quote. We have all had the urge to just take off and go. I have done this on occasions in my life. However, afterward, I have always been happy and thankful to be able to return to my permanent space. I agree with Dorothy....there is no place like home.


I agree with you, Larkwoodgirl. I enjoy my refuge, too. I'm comfortable here with my "stuff". On the other hand, some people can take it to the exreme, like my parents, who never wanted to leave their sanctuary. Thus they were prisoners of their own home. I don't think they looked at it that way, but I did. My father can't spend more than 2 nights away from his house--and that is even tough for him. I don't take it that far. I'd head off to Jamaica or France at a moment's notice, if I could. But I am very "attached" to sentimental stuff--like my hard drive (argggghhh), my photo albums, special clothes (mine and the kids), our artwork, and Johnny magazines. I'm a bit obsessive in this regard. :lol:


I love my home too, not because of the material nature of it, its a very modest home, but because for me it represents a sanctuary away from the world, i raised my daughter in it - before i bought it, we had so many shifts - every few months or so for five years, but eventually, what with schooling etc it was good to settle into a home, interestingly even though she has been away for five years now, when i mentioned i might be shifting at some stage she said "oh then i wont have a home to come to" - its also been her base. I like going out in to the world and travelling but i love having a base to come back to - its where i read my books, listen to music or just be - sit in the garden. However saying this, i have become incredibly attached to my computer "Dellboy" yes he has a name and i even caught myself talking to him/it? saying "hello" now thats a worry, also now im in the zone, im very attached to my photobucket - my music is on my computer, so i guess its a treasured possession again not so much for the material nature of it, but because of this wonderful world of the ethernet - weird i know but the zone is quite a spiritual place for me too!!! i love the ONBC and Inspiration very much.

I once read somewhere but can't remember where that
Everything we have in this world is lent to us, we all lose it
eventually, so the ability to let go of stuff both material and spiritual baggage is a good ability to have or learn, sometimes even if we dont want to we can have stuff taken away, material possessions, health, relationships. I have also heard of the term status anxiety - relating to all the stuff that people want or desire in this world - material, position etc etc. All this stuff eventually goes anyway.

Sorry about the rave getting rather carried away here -
"One time he, (Marlon Brando), says to me: 'How many films do you do a year?' I said, 'I dunno. Two or three.' He says, 'You've got to watch yourself. We've only got so many faces in our pocket.' "

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Unread postby Liz » Sat Jan 22, 2005 12:42 am

Gypsylee wrote:DITHOT wrote:
"Every once in a while I stop and think if I had five minutes to get anything out of my house or lose it what would I take."

I would grab my computer!!! :rotflmao:


The photo albums used to be number 1 on the list--all 15 of them. Then there is a whole 4 drawyer filing cabinet full of pics and memorabilia I haven't put into albums yet. But the computer is now at the top of the list.:rotflmao:
You can't judge a book by its cover.

The only thing that matters is the ending. It's the most important part of the story.

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Re: FI Question #19: My precioussssssss....

Unread postby Liz » Sat Jan 22, 2005 12:53 am

truelymadlydepply wrote:
Liz wrote:
Larkwoodgirl wrote:To me this quote implies something a little bit different. I personally do not resent my "permanent space" and the stuff that is in it. In no way do I find it controlling or restricting. My home is my sanctuary from the the world. I view it as a refuge and not as a trap. If I did not have a permanent space in which to seek refuge and peace, I think I would probably go mad. To me the world can be an overwhelming place from which retreat is often needed.

I understand the sentiment of the quote. We have all had the urge to just take off and go. I have done this on occasions in my life. However, afterward, I have always been happy and thankful to be able to return to my permanent space. I agree with Dorothy....there is no place like home.


I agree with you, Larkwoodgirl. I enjoy my refuge, too. I'm comfortable here with my "stuff". On the other hand, some people can take it to the exreme, like my parents, who never wanted to leave their sanctuary. Thus they were prisoners of their own home. I don't think they looked at it that way, but I did. My father can't spend more than 2 nights away from his house--and that is even tough for him. I don't take it that far. I'd head off to Jamaica or France at a moment's notice, if I could. But I am very "attached" to sentimental stuff--like my hard drive (argggghhh), my photo albums, special clothes (mine and the kids), our artwork, and Johnny magazines. I'm a bit obsessive in this regard. :lol:


I love my home too, not because of the material nature of it, its a very modest home, but because for me it represents a sanctuary away from the world, i raised my daughter in it - before i bought it, we had so many shifts - every few months or so for five years, but eventually, what with schooling etc it was good to settle into a home, interestingly even though she has been away for five years now, when i mentioned i might be shifting at some stage she said "oh then i wont have a home to come to" - its also been her base. I like going out in to the world and travelling but i love having a base to come back to - its where i read my books, listen to music or just be - sit in the garden. However saying this, i have become incredibly attached to my computer "Dellboy" yes he has a name and i even caught myself talking to him/it? saying "hello" now thats a worry, also now im in the zone, im very attached to my photobucket - my music is on my computer, so i guess its a treasured possession again not so much for the material nature of it, but because of this wonderful world of the ethernet - weird i know but the zone is quite a spiritual place for me too!!! i love the ONBC and Inspiration very much.

I once read somewhere but can't remember where that
Everything we have in this world is lent to us, we all lose it
eventually, so the ability to let go of stuff both material and spiritual baggage is a good ability to have or learn, sometimes even if we dont want to we can have stuff taken away, material possessions, health, relationships. I have also heard of the term status anxiety - relating to all the stuff that people want or desire in this world - material, position etc etc. All this stuff eventually goes anyway.

Sorry about the rave getting rather carried away here -


You can't take it with you. I know this, but I still can't let go of my sentimental stuff. And here's another thing. Whenever I give away something--I don't care what it is--I invariably NEED it within the next 6 mos.--usually for a costume for my kids for a school play or something. Does this ever happen to you?
You can't judge a book by its cover.

The only thing that matters is the ending. It's the most important part of the story.

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Re: FI Question #19: My precioussssssss....

Unread postby truelymadlydepply » Sat Jan 22, 2005 2:02 am

Liz wrote:
truelymadlydepply wrote:
Liz wrote:
Larkwoodgirl wrote:To me this quote implies something a little bit different. I personally do not resent my "permanent space" and the stuff that is in it. In no way do I find it controlling or restricting. My home is my sanctuary from the the world. I view it as a refuge and not as a trap. If I did not have a permanent space in which to seek refuge and peace, I think I would probably go mad. To me the world can be an overwhelming place from which retreat is often needed.

I understand the sentiment of the quote. We have all had the urge to just take off and go. I have done this on occasions in my life. However, afterward, I have always been happy and thankful to be able to return to my permanent space. I agree with Dorothy....there is no place like home.


I agree with you, Larkwoodgirl. I enjoy my refuge, too. I'm comfortable here with my "stuff". On the other hand, some people can take it to the exreme, like my parents, who never wanted to leave their sanctuary. Thus they were prisoners of their own home. I don't think they looked at it that way, but I did. My father can't spend more than 2 nights away from his house--and that is even tough for him. I don't take it that far. I'd head off to Jamaica or France at a moment's notice, if I could. But I am very "attached" to sentimental stuff--like my hard drive (argggghhh), my photo albums, special clothes (mine and the kids), our artwork, and Johnny magazines. I'm a bit obsessive in this regard. :lol:


I love my home too, not because of the material nature of it, its a very modest home, but because for me it represents a sanctuary away from the world, i raised my daughter in it - before i bought it, we had so many shifts - every few months or so for five years, but eventually, what with schooling etc it was good to settle into a home, interestingly even though she has been away for five years now, when i mentioned i might be shifting at some stage she said "oh then i wont have a home to come to" - its also been her base. I like going out in to the world and travelling but i love having a base to come back to - its where i read my books, listen to music or just be - sit in the garden. However saying this, i have become incredibly attached to my computer "Dellboy" yes he has a name and i even caught myself talking to him/it? saying "hello" now thats a worry, also now im in the zone, im very attached to my photobucket - my music is on my computer, so i guess its a treasured possession again not so much for the material nature of it, but because of this wonderful world of the ethernet - weird i know but the zone is quite a spiritual place for me too!!! i love the ONBC and Inspiration very much.

I once read somewhere but can't remember where that
Everything we have in this world is lent to us, we all lose it
eventually, so the ability to let go of stuff both material and spiritual baggage is a good ability to have or learn, sometimes even if we dont want to we can have stuff taken away, material possessions, health, relationships. I have also heard of the term status anxiety - relating to all the stuff that people want or desire in this world - material, position etc etc. All this stuff eventually goes anyway.

Sorry about the rave getting rather carried away here -


You can't take it with you. I know this, but I still can't let go of my sentimental stuff. And here's another thing. Whenever I give away something--I don't care what it is--I invariably NEED it within the next 6 mos.--usually for a costume for my kids for a school play or something. Does this ever happen to you?


yep it does
i dont think the fact that we cant take stuff with us means we have to get rid of it necessarily, maybe it just means realising that nothing lasts forever?
i dont think it means giving stuff away now
especially stuff of sentimental value, i could never give away photos of my daughter and gifts that someone gave to me
but yeah i certainly know that feeling of hunting around the house for something i need right now and realising drat.... i threw that out, gave that away etc etc
"One time he, (Marlon Brando), says to me: 'How many films do you do a year?' I said, 'I dunno. Two or three.' He says, 'You've got to watch yourself. We've only got so many faces in our pocket.' "

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Unread postby suec » Sat Jan 22, 2005 6:56 am

Truelymadlydepply, I love the idea of you naming your computer and talking to it. I do too, but only to screech abuse at it when it won't let me do something Johnny-related.

I think some people do feel trapped by the notion of owning things. I have a friend who regrets taking on a mortgage, because when she was renting, she could just move on when she felt like it, but that is not so easy when you have to sell your home. She would like to live in a caravan, I think.

I see my home very differently. It represents freedom to me. More specifically, I suppose, independence. If I rented, I would still have to stump up the cash to have a roof over my head. But my home is mine, in the sense that I can do what I like with it - within the bounds of building regulations. It reflects my taste, or is beginning to. I still haven't changed the kitchen. It is my personal space, and as such, very preciousssss to me. In fact, downright essential. But very little has sentimental value. I don't mind discarding most things - except books. I hoard those! Even those I have no intention of reading again. I like to travel. But I would hate not having my home to , well, come home to.

I don't think things are traps. I think people are. Other people's expectations and wants and assumptions, telling us what we want, when they really mean what they want. But deadliest of all are the traps we make for ourselves. At least, some people do. We build our own cages out of our self-image and fears and habits and beliefs that we can't change... It's all in the mind. Which is one of the reasons why TR encourages us to be free-thinkers, I think.
"Luck... inspiration... both only really happen to you when you empty your heart of ambition, purpose, and plan; when you give yourself, completely, to the golden, fate-filled moment."

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Unread postby surfmom » Mon Jan 24, 2005 3:00 pm

I don't think things are traps. I think people are. Other people's expectations and wants and assumptions, telling us what we want, when they really mean what they want. But deadliest of all are the traps we make for ourselves. At least, some people do. We build our own cages out of our self-image and fears and habits and beliefs that we can't change... It's all in the mind. Which is one of the reasons why TR encourages us to be free-thinkers, I think._________________


I believe you are right on the "money"--so to speak. I do believe that consumerism can trap us, medicate us, or addict us, but it is more important how we THINK about those things, and about the judgements of those around us. Just the thought of becoming "adult" and responsible can feel trapping/restrictive. Many feel lost in there, lose sense of who they are. The mortgage, the bills, the job, the kids, the husband---all the things we are supposed to do in life. The "shoulds". I recall an old saying that Robbins would use: "Thou shall not should on thyself".

I am all too keen on the power of our own thinking and how it controls our outlook. I often have to battle with this little self-critical voice deep inside. I know it's not the stuff, the clutter, the THINGS that bog me down, but that voice. ARGH!!

We are our thoughts and choices. Our own thinking can trap us.

S

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Unread postby Liz » Mon Jan 24, 2005 5:34 pm

surfmom wrote: The "shoulds". I recall an old saying that Robbins would use: "Thou shall not should on thyself".


Thanks for that little tidbit, Surfmom. That's going into my Robbins and my inspirational quote files. :cool:
You can't judge a book by its cover.

The only thing that matters is the ending. It's the most important part of the story.

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Unread postby DeppInTheHeartOfTexas » Mon Jan 24, 2005 7:53 pm

surfmom wrote: "Thou shall not should on thyself".


Good point. I think I would add "should have" as well.
Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming -
Wow! What a ride!


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